Published
January 14, 2026
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Kira is a 30‑year‑old from Virginia who travels frequently for her work in higher education. Kamal, 82, is a retired engineer who spent the first part of his life in India before moving to the U.S. and building a career in corporate America. Now they both live in New York City, where despite their different cultural backgrounds and a 52-year age gap, Kira and Kamal have been good friends since 2022, when they were paired through DOROT’s Friendly Visiting program. In Friendly Visiting, older adults welcome volunteers into their homes for weekly or monthly visits that foster genuine, lasting friendships.
But how does that happen? How do two strangers introduced by an outside agency grow to become good friends?
It begins with participants themselves, all of whom want to make space in their lives for a new friend. Then it’s up to DOROT’s social workers. In a process that’s part instinct, part formula, they take great care in matching individuals based on shared interests, experiences, and other signs of compatibility. “We really put a lot of thought, care, and intention into getting to know all of our participants, creating a match that hopefully leads to a meaningful and long-lasting connection,” Jenny Smith, Social Work Supervisor, explains. (The team is so excited when they make a match that they ring a special gong they bring to meetings.)
After a match is made, the social work team continues to support both participants, providing guidance on ways to connect with their new friend (keep scrolling for tips!), and following up on the first few meetings to ensure the relationship is going well. Still, each pair finds their own way of spending time together, whether that’s talking about family, playing board games, or sharing a strong cup of coffee.
Kamal and Kira’s bond grew through weekly discussions founded on an intellectual back-and-forth and a shared curiosity about other cultures.
“Kira is so bright. She follows current events and politics, which I’m very much into.” Kamal says. He enjoys learning what younger people are interested in, and sharing his knowledge in return, especially when it comes to music and film. Their visits often include lively discussions about movies, with Kamal sharing his love of film noir and Kira enjoying the historical and cultural context he includes about the movies he loves.
Kira describes Kamal as “someone who is not just focused on their own life, but other people and the world”—exactly the type of person she was hoping to connect with as a Friendly Visitor. They often talk about their cultural backgrounds—Kamal’s Indian heritage and Kira’s Japanese heritage—as well as a love for exploring other cultures, often through food. Kira might bring over an interesting condiment, like a Chinese chili paste, for Kamal to try, or he’ll work on perfecting a new recipe with her help.
For Kira, one of the most meaningful parts of visiting Kamal is the shift in perspective it gives her, especially when she’s feeling bogged down by work or life. “Kamal has had so many different things happen in his life,” she said, which reminds her that whatever is going on now is just one part of the journey. “There are so many things that can happen in anyone’s life. The whole world is your oyster.”
Learn More About Friendly Visiting
Rediscover the magic of meaningful, in-real-life connection. Volunteer for our Friendly Visiting program or learn more about welcoming a Friendly Visitor. And remember, we’ve got tons of ideas to help you connect with a new friend!
Seven Tips for Connecting with a Friendly Visiting Match
- Use your surroundings. Talk about what photos, art, and memorabilia you see in the room to unearth stories, personal history, and more. 🖼️
- Take turns discussing your interests, hobbies, or careers to find common ground 📽️
- Start with topics you know you have in common, like living in the area, current events, or historical events you’ve experienced. 💬
- Explore books, movies, or music—share your favorites or discover new ones together. 📘
- Create together, whether it’s doing an art project, taking/organizing photos, cooking, or knitting. 🎨
- Take part in friendly competition with a game. Board games, chess, word games, puzzles… the options are endless! ♟️
- Head outside for a walk, enjoy views from a park bench, or visit a museum. 🌳